It’s been 3 years since I left the job that I thought I was going to do forever. Whenever I reflect, I’m filled with sadness, remorse, and peace. If that’s baffling, welcome. This is why the reflection is hard for me to do, it’s confusing to miss something so much and not want it back.
I was actually supposed to do a reflection at the one-year mark. That didn’t work out (thanks Covid) so I tried again at the two-year mark. That didn’t work either (that “failed” paper that popped out when I took my BCBA exam the first time made it hard). Fast forward to now. I did pass the exam, my center is open and running smoothly and I can finally reflect!
We will break this down into 4 sections
- The process of leaving teaching
- Transitioning from teaching to the center
- What I thought being a BCBA would be like and what it is actually like
- Which job do I like more
Section 1: The Process of Leaving Teaching
I have a whole podcast episode dedicated to why I left teaching. It’s called “Making the Decision” and it’s packed full a ton of valuable information. Once I knew I needed to leave my classroom. I had to figure out if a different classroom, grade, or school would be better or if I needed to get out of the school system. It quickly became evident that I don’t actually like teaching so going to a different school wasn’t going to change that. Luckily, the next opportunity fell into my lap.
I was in an IEP meeting and I met a BCBA who owns her own ABA Center. I really liked what she was doing and I knew I wanted to work for her. That’s obviously not the case for everyone so I did design a worksheet to go with that podcast that walks through other things I considered that could be helpful if you’re trying to figure out what your next step should be.
Section 2: Transitioning from the teaching to the center
When I left teaching to go to the center, I was not planning on becoming a BCBA. I had my graduate certificate in Applied Behavior Analysis, but between hesitancy in leaving teaching, concern about passing the exam, and nerves about if I would even like a center, I wanted to ease into it. I run a TpT business that supports my income and my husband has a steady job and health insurance, which enabled me to accept a part-time job. This let me dip my toes into the word of center-based work.
I also knew I really wanted to reclaim Nicole. I did not need to leave teaching to do this but I lost myself in my job. I wanted to draw more firm boundaries. I wanted to spend more time doing things I liked doing. I wanted to put more time into my mental health, as well as my physical health. And I wanted to give my husband and my dog back the wife/mom they were not getting. And three years later, I can officially say I achieved that goal.
Section 3: What I thought being a BCBA would be like vs. What it actually is like
In case you missed a step, I decided about 8 months into working at the center that I wanted to become a BCBA. I started on the track in March 2020 (worst timing ever) and passed the BCBA exam in July 2021. By early 2021 I was at the center a lot and thought I knew exactly what being a BCBA would be like. Here is what I thought
- Working 25 hours a week or 100 hours a month
- Possibility of going full time
- Working one Saturday a month
- Working primarily with early childhood students
The job did not end up like that at all, and I’m actually really grateful. I like what I have a lot more than what I envisioned. Here is the reality
- Working 10 hours a week or 40ish hours a month
- Very much part-time, usually 1-2 partial week-days max
- Work 2-3 Saturdays a month and LOVE it
- Work with students in elementary and middle school
I spend a lot more time at home than I thought I would. I spend a lot more of my weekend at the center than I thought I would. I spent a lot more time with middle schoolers than I thought I would. And honestly, I love it all. Where I am is not where I thought I was going to be but it’s exactly where I want to be.
Section 4: Which job do I like more?
I know this is a completely unsatisfying answer but I don’t have one. In my mid-20s I would not have been able to have a part-time position. I’m not even sure if I could’ve passed the BCBA exam back then. Teaching was the job that I needed at that time and being a BCBA is the job that I need right now because I’m a different person at 32 than I was at 23.
If I hadn’t found my center, I don’t know if I would’ve made the jump. If they only hired a full-time therapist, I don’t know if I would’ve made the jump. If my husband had not gotten a promotion at his job to help me feel more stable with my household, I don’t know if I would’ve made the jump. I don’t regret the time I spent teaching nor do I regret leaving. There will always be pros and cons to the job I used to have in the job I have now. But right now, I’m very happy with the switch I made and at the end of the day, that’s all that’s really important.